Making Love a Priority

Here is a little “happy family” tip that will hopefully help you as much as it has helped me.  It”s a visual tool that has really helped me connect with each of my children and my husband on a daily basis.

It was an idea born from my “Mommy Day Off” while Otter was having all her tantrums. I realized that all the other Sweet Peas were acting out because it was the way to grab my attention away from the other child acting out. Talk about C.H.A.O.S.

This is my least favorite scenario:  my children are acting out, and I get frustrated and yell because I am tired or have too much on my plate, and then I feel guilty because I was Crazy Mommy, and they are scared because they felt aggression…that is a circle I definitely want to avoid.

When the Sweet Peas and my husband receive love in their “language”, they are acknowledged, honored, and then everything things to run more smoothly.  So what I did was print out a visual reminder of the 5 Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman. I put the chart up on the inside of my medicine cabinet so I could look at it every day while I brushed my teeth. I hoped it would remind me to connect with them daily.

It helped – kind of. At least I was looking at it every day and trying to meet everyone in their love language(s).

I did one little thing two weeks ago that has made a huge difference.  I color-coded it!! I used our dry erase markers and marked the chart so that not only am I reviewing the love languages, I am checking in every day with who needs to hear/feel/see what they respond to every day!! Duh! How did it take me four months to figure that little piece out?

Well, at least it did finally occur to me to make the adjustment…and it has helped immensely. Now it works like a checklist.  Everytime I wash my hands, I look at the chart to see who needs what, and I ask myself if I have I met them in their love language yet that day. If not, then they are next and I can check in with them before moving along my daily “to-do” list.

By making sure that my family is receiving love the way they feel loved every day, we are all operating from a much more peaceful place.  My biggest “button” (another topic all together that I will write about some other time) is “Love and Connection” – if all the relationships in my circle are tended and healthy, then I am at peace and feeling fulfilled.

Here is my chart.  I was a bad girl and just did a “copy/paste” of the emblems from the 5 Love Languages website, hence the grainy picture I am sharing because this is for informational purposes only!

Love Languages Chart

I am not sure how you will choose to create yours – there are probably lots of ways to make this much more fabulous! I would love to see what you come up with if you think this is something that will help you create a more peaceful home.  You can email me your creation: sweetpeafamilies{at}gmail{dot}com.

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