Author Archives: Cassandra Okamoto

New Year’s Resolutions: 2014

New Year’s Eve & New Year’s Day are quite possibly my two favorite days — the excitement of the evening, the opportunity for reflection and reminiscing and the promise and possibility of a new year. Every year for the past six years my husband and I have made a big deal out of preparing our resolutions on January 1st, each year seems to bring a different kind of format.

2014

One year we did vision boards, a vision of our entire year. Things we wanted to remember each day, things we wanted to accomplish, things to look forward to, mantras, new skills to master, etc. We got to cutting out of magazines, printing pictures & sayings off line, arranging and glueing. We hung the boards in our office where we could see them every day. This was a particularly fun one, I don’t know how much accountability this year had though — the boards had ALOT on them, probably enough for a lifetime, rather than just one year. Super fun nonetheless and I would really like to recreate this activity when our little T can participate.

Another year was more SMART goal oriented, very specific with specific plans in place to quantify, measure, access & evaluate and hopefully accomplish. These are great and my husband and I both LOVE checking things off of to-do lists but as we grew we became more focused on making the journey count, rather than just the feeling of completion.

The next year we focused on themes or sayings for the year, did we want this year to be about growth, or appreciation, kindness, calmness? Sometimes it was just a word, sometimes a year long mantra that could be placed on the refrigerator or other high visibility area.

At the end of 2011 I was expecting our little bundle of joy and knew I had BIG changes ahead of me in 2012. I was not returning to my job outside of the house and life as I knew it was going to be 100% different. This time I made “tasks” or reminders for each month, I knew this year was going to be about survival and necessary adaptation I would be ebbing, flowing, and changing all over the place and thought it would be nice to have little things that I could look forward to and accomplish. They included things like:

January – go to 4 prenatal yoga classes

March – write in baby blog each week

April  – don’t stress!

May – practice sewing

September – plant a garden

I really liked this format too, it wasn’t too overwhelming and I actually crossed off a lot of items! It made the coming and going of each month kind of fun too (:

Last year I came down with the worst case of the flu the day before New Year’s Eve. We had reservations at our favorite restaurant to have a much needed date night out while baby stayed at Granny’s and we had to cancel. I was throwing up for two days and finally just turning a corner on New Year’s Day. We were staying with family and hoping to relocate soon and I am not sure if we actually made any concrete resolutions, this year turned out to be one heck of a crazy ride though and I could not possibly be one bit happier with where we are now!

I am not exactly sure how our “resolutions” are going to manifest this year — I saw this on Facebook yesterday though and we are definitely going to make these jars!  If we can keep it up over the next couple of years I think it will be so awesome to help T with a jar of his own.

I do know that I want to be more present this year, appreciate more of what is happening around me right then, find a way to help our toddler (& us!!) sleep more, learn to & practice sewing (this has been on the list for years, is 2014 the year!?), meditate more and a lot of other things I need to think on // regardless, it is going to be a great year welcomed in with champagne and some hoppin’ john, collards and cornbread!

What are your resolutions for 2014? Do you have any New Year’s Eve or New Year’s Day traditions? How do you include your sweet peas? Happy New Year!!! <3

 

 

Tuesday Tip: Holiday Gift Edition + Toddlers

Despite my husband and me being very anti “stuff” and rarely buying new toys for the toddler in our life, he somehow ends up accumulating things nonetheless – with the help of friends, grandparents, etc. I know this is the case with most people I know and with the help of my own toddler I recently discovered the perfect low key, not-going-to-break-the-bank, “non stuff” gift for toddlers this holiday season… the gift of song.

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My almost 21 month old has been obsessed with his songs lately, in the car, in the stroller, during evening dance parties and I found myself playing the same Raffi songs over and over (all available here). I looked to my trusty group of Arizona mama friends for some toddler music inspiration and have compiled all of their answers below! CD’s, digital downloads, or a Spotify gift card are all awesome ways to spread some toddler entertainment this year 🙂

Elizabeth Mitchell

You Are My Flower

You Are My Sunshine

You Are My Little Bird

Sunny Day

Little Seed

Blue Clouds

Dan Zanes & Friends

Rocket Ship Beach

Family Dance

Catch That Train!

Little Nut Tree

Renee & Jeremy

A Little Love

C’Mon

It’s A Big World

Octopretzel

Octopretzel

If I Were A Song

Caspar Babypants

Baby Beatles!

I Found You!

Hot Dog!

Sing Along!

This Is Fun!

More Please!

Here I Am!

Kimya Dawson

Alphabutt

They Might Be Giants

No!

Here Come the ABC’s

Here Come the 123’s

Barenaked Ladies

Snacktime

Trout Fishing in America

See all of their CD’s here

Various Artists

For The Kids

For The Kids Too!

For The Kids Three!

Are there any other children’s artists or CD’s that you and your kids love?? Let us know!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Munchkin Meals: Food On The Go

Another month has passed and Munchkin Meals from A Healthy Slice of Life are back! Nothing remarkable has really changed with T’s meals and/or eats so I thought I would switch it up with some things he has been enjoying on the go.

Snacks are always a little hard for me — nothing *too* messy since it will end up all over him/me/the stroller/the car, needs to be something I can grab fairly quickly while trying to get us out of the house, I don’t like to default to bunnies, O’s or the like and variety is important to me since he is more of a snacker/grazer than a three meal a day kind of kid.

So what have we been taking with us these days?

Fresh Fruit 

I know, this is easy and obvious, but… it is easy and obvious! (And nutritious). Berries are still in season here on the coast but will probably be slowing down right about now. Super fast to throw raspberries, blackberries or strawberries into a snack cup & go.

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Grapes are another awesome farmer’s market find these days and again, just throw into the cup & head out.

Apples, plums, and asian pears are abundant right now from one of our local favorites, Inzana Ranch. I chop the plums and pears but these little Fuji apples are such a perfect toddler snack with minimal preperation. I just peel the skin and he eats them whole.

20131105-183905.jpg It is a great car/stroller activity too and I have recently read across the internet that apples have enzymes or acids in them that are supposedly supposed to help with teething pain which is another major plus since T is currently cutting all four incisors at once (:

taking an apple out with him on Halloween!

taking an apple out with him on Halloween!

As I mentioned last month I have a love affair with bananas despite their long distance travels and nothing has changed this month. They are just so darn easy!

loves his bananas

loves his bananas

perfect for stroller rides

perfect for stroller rides

Dried Fruit

T is LOVING on raisins lately — lucky for us in addition to great fresh fruit Izana Ranch also stocks various types of yummy raisins!

this week we decided to try the "crimson"

this week we decided to try the “crimson”

These dried blueberries from Trader Joe’s are also great, nothing added — just freeze dried blueberries.

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Baked Sweet Potato Rounds

I make up a big batch of these at once and they are perfect for on the go. Cutting them in rounds makes them less squish-able then chunks and therefore less messy for us. T loves them.

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Gluten Free Grahams 

We are lucky enough to live very close to a Whole Foods & T has really been happy about these gluten free cinnamon graham crackers lately. Again, trying not to make a habit of it, but they are super easy to just throw into a snack cup and be done with it.

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Chickpeas

I forgot to snap a picture but recently I have discovered what a great snack whole garbanzo beans are! I buy the Eden Organics because their cans are BPA Free or else I make our own using dried beans. Beware, they will get stinky QUICKLY if left in a car, diaper bag, etc. but they are a nice switch up from fruit and crackers and a great source of fiber plus some protein. They are the perfect size for little toddler fingers, too.

What foods do you take for your toddlers or children when you leave the house? Do you have any go to or easy snack options? T & I both thank you in advance for any ideas (:

 

 

 

 

Munchkin Meals: Another Month of T’s Eats

I can’t believe another month has passed since the last time we featured Munchkin Meals! My son, T, is turning 19 months old on Monday (he is now closer to two than one, aaahhh!) so below is a sampling of what we offered him during his 19th month of life!

Breakfasts

sweet potatoes roasted in coconut oil & cinnamon, banana slices & cheese with a side of 1 parts fresh apple juice & 3 parts water - simple, simple.

sweet potatoes roasted in coconut oil & cinnamon, banana slices & cheese with a side of 1 parts fresh apple juice & 3 parts water – simple, simple.

He opened the pantry & asked for some “o’s” this particular morning, so I obliged..

+ the beloved O's!

+ the beloved O’s!

Trader Joe’s has these Toasted O’s that are gluten free with a short ingredient list that I buy occasionally as T loves them for stroller and car snacks & has fun putting them on his little fingers (:

figs, strawberries, avocado & more roasted sweet potatoes

fresh figs, strawberries, avocado & more roasted sweet potatoes

we always have breakfast while still in our PJ's (: banana, olives and pluot with a side of coconut water

we always have breakfast while still in our PJ’s (: banana, olives and pluot with a side of coconut water

nectarine, fresh fig, and a pancake topped with tahini & honey. The pancake is: whole wheat flour, egg, raw cream + ACV as buttermilk, vanilla, cinnamon, ginger, a little ground flax seed & baking powder.

nectarine, fresh fig, and a pancake topped with tahini & honey. The pancake is: whole wheat flour, egg, raw cream + ACV as buttermilk, vanilla, cinnamon, ginger, ground flax seed & baking powder.

I have since decided to finally bite the bullet and go 100% gluten free after various practitioners have been recommending it to me for years – literally about 7 years. If I am entirely gluten free then T will also be gluten free (until he can prepare food himself) so no more wheat pancakes, but we have been making really tasty oat and coconut flour ones! I love that they are filled with protein and good fats along with spices and no sugar. They are perfect to cut up and take as a snack too, T loves eating them with or without toppings.

pancake to go

pancake to go

Lunches

tortilla with almond butter, sweet potatoes, corn chips with homemade guacamole & healing movement orange blend cultured vegetables

tortilla with almond butter, sweet potatoes, corn chips with homemade guacamole & healing movement orange blend cultured vegetables

strawberries, fennel barley risotto, carrots, green beans & cheese

strawberries, fennel barley risotto, carrots, green beans & cheese

baked zucchini "fries", banana topped with tahini and heirloom tomatoes

baked zucchini “fries”, banana topped with tahini and heirloom tomatoes

roasted squash with coconut oil, banana with peanut butter & strawberries

roasted squash with coconut oil, banana with peanut butter & strawberries

corn and black beans, avocado, yellow nectarine and pluot

corn and black beans, avocado, yellow nectarine and pluot

baked sweet potato wedges, roasted broccoli, chicken and plum

baked sweet potato wedges, roasted broccoli, chicken and plum

shared lunch with mama: turkey, avocado & tomato on romaine topped with deli mustard

shared lunch with mama: turkey, avocado & tomato on romaine topped with deli mustard

Dinners

Again, I am so bad at taking pictures of dinner but I remembered a few more times this month!

roasted golden beets, adobo slow cooker chicken with mushrooms & onions, and banana slices. Not pictured: rice - makes such a huge mess, I try to help him with it as much as he will let me.

roasted golden beets, adobo slow cooker chicken with mushrooms & onions, and banana slices. Not pictured: rice – makes such a huge mess, I try to help him with it as much as he will let me.

HEAB/CD's dinner hash: yukon potatoes, grass fed ground beef, mushrooms, onions, and sauerkraut

HEAB/CD’s dinner hash: yukon potatoes, grass fed ground beef, mushrooms, onions, and sauerkraut

deconstructed tuna casserole: brown rice noodles, peas, and tuna fish all coated in the cashew/nutritional yeast "cheese" sauce

deconstructed tuna noodle casserole: brown rice noodles, peas, and tuna fish all coated in the cashew/nutritional yeast “cheese” sauce

local albacore tuna from our CSA topped with avocado mousse, white rice (was feeling brave this night letting him go to town on the rice alone) & radish/cucumber topped with flax oil

local albacore tuna from our CSA topped with avocado mousse, white rice (was feeling brave this night letting him go to town on the rice alone) & radish/cucumber dressed with flax oil

chili, corn bread and a little cheese.

chili, corn bread and a little cheese.

The only produce that we purchased outside of the farmer’s market this month (aside from one bag of frozen peas for the tuna casserole) was bananas. As we know, bananas grow *nowhere* near us, in a climate nothing like the one we experience. I have not researched banana plantations in depth and although I always purchase organic, they are still from Dole and as a large multinational company I will never entirely trust their practices. BUT, I just can not stop buying them for T, ah! They are so convenient to take with us out of the house, a great source of fiber, easy to top with healthy fats (peanut butter, almond butter, tahini) and have a long counter life. Do the benefits outweigh the negatives? Are there any good alternatives? What do you all think?

What have your kiddos been eating this month, I can always use new ideas and recipes!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Munchkin Meals: T’s Eats at at 17/18 Months

Happy Thursday! In place of our usual Thoughtful Thursday, today I am participating in Brittany at A Healthy Slice of Life‘s Munchkin Meals. A couple of months ago I shared a lot about *how* little T eats and thought this would be fun to showcase what he has been enjoying eating lately!

Breakfast

Breakfast always has fruit, maybe a pancake/french toast/muffin, sometimes cheese and then usually another random fat/protein source accompanied by a green smoothie

strawberries, chicken, cheese & banana with a side of green smoothie: kale, mustard greens, frozen fruit medley, 1/2 banana, flax seed & water

strawberries, chicken, cheese & banana with a side of green smoothie: kale, mustard greens, frozen fruit medley, 1/2 banana, flax seed & water

half a banana, french toast on local/organic whole wheat bread, grapes & strawberries

half a banana, french toast on local/organic whole wheat bread, grapes & strawberries

T saying "haaawt" to his french toast (:

T saying “haaawt” to his french toast (:

we usually make a green smoothie at home every morning but if we happen to be low on ingredients or in a rush T also loves these green smoothies from Trader Joe's!

we usually make a green smoothie at home every morning but if we happen to be low on ingredients or in a rush T also loves these green smoothies from Trader Joe’s!

AM Snack

While we are out & about during our morning adventure I bring T cut up fresh fruit, roasted sweet potatoes and sometimes almond butter/almond butter & jam sandwiches to snack on

Pre Nap Lunch

I usually put a light lunch out when we get home before T takes his nap.

green beans, chick peas & kidney beans & banana with half OJ/half water

green beans, chick peas & kidney beans & banana with half OJ/half water

peach, chicken & black eyed peas

peach, chicken & black eyed peas

strawberries, oranges, roasted sweet potatoes, white potatoes & raw milk cheese

strawberries, oranges, roasted sweet potatoes, white potatoes & raw milk cheese

frozen peas, blueberries, cheese & banana topped with almond butter

frozen peas, blueberries, cheese & banana topped with almond butter

decisions, decisions (:

decisions, decisions (:

After Nap Lunch

This is usually a heartier plate, I would say this is the time of day T eats the most food at one sitting.

strawberries, lentils & rice, beet saurkraut, golden beets, and a cut up leftover pancake from the AM (almond flour, egg, flax seed, olive oil, baking powder & banana)

strawberries, lentils & rice, beet saurkraut, golden beets, and a cut up leftover pancake from the AM (almond flour, egg, flax seed, olive oil, baking powder & banana)

strawberries, peaches, golden beets & lentils

strawberries, peaches, golden beets & lentils

strawberries, olives, curried green beans, carrots & potatoes

strawberries, olives, curried green beans, carrots & potatoes

white potatoes, red bell peppers, raspberries & a whole wheat tortilla wrap with almond butter & fig spread

white potatoes, red bell peppers, raspberries & a whole wheat tortilla wrap with almond butter & fig spread

Dinner

I don’t have pictures of dinner because we are usually all sitting down as a family and I don’t have my phone/ always forget to get a snapshot. T eats whatever we are having, often he just grazes off of our plates too. This night we were having black cod, sauerkraut, and a green salad. He ate the fish & sauerkraut and I filled his placemat up with some leftovers from lunch too.

strawberries, sauerkraut, miso black cod, leftover chicken, black eyed peas & cheese from lunch

strawberries, sauerkraut, miso black cod, leftover chicken, black eyed peas & cheese from lunch

So there you have it, a mix of all the different kinds of foods T has been discovering, playing with, and eating lately! We shop at the farmer’s markets for most of our fruits, vegetables and bread so a lot of things that are in season are recurring on his plate, especially strawberries 🙂 As we venture into fall I am excited to see different crops offered (the first butternut squash made an appearance this week!!!)  and try out some new, seasonal recipes!

Thoughtful Thursday: On Being “That” Mom

me taking the 1,456th pictures of my son & I, can't get enough of him!

me taking the 1,456th pictures of my son & I – can’t get enough of him!

 

 

Happy Thursday! Today I thought I would share some random thoughts about mama-hood that are always bouncing around my head. Specifically about stereotypes and being “that” mom.

The mom that always gets funny looks & sideways glances, at the park, at toddler classes, at the museum, at restaurants. I am definitely “that” mom.

“That” Mom whose child always has snot/drool/etc. on his face

T gets a runny nose with every set of teeth that come in, it has happened every single time since his first set at 5 ½ months. I know it is due to his teeth and sometimes even progresses to a cough. Read more about that here. I know he isn’t “sick” and I follow his cues on if we need to stay home, take it easy, or go about with our normal activities. In addition to that, I try really hard every day to respect my son’s body and space. I allow him to wipe his own face and recently his dad taught him to blow his nose, yes it is not as efficient as me holding him and doing a rough swoop to get everything but when/if it bothers him, he knows how to take care of it himself.

“That” Mom who is always super late

Living on a toddler‘s timetable is a foolproof way to never get anywhere even remotely on time. T likes to take his time: waking up, getting dressed, eating, going to the bathroom, going to sleep, walking, pretty much everything. He needs natural, organic transitions from one activity to the next and we have a much more harmonious relationship when I provide that. Both of us are happier and working together and it makes for much smoother, calmer days. Do I sometimes feel like my entire life is dictated by what a very small human feels or wants right then? Yes. Is it hard to deal with sometimes? Yes. But in reality, that is my life. Right now, my entire days revolve around facilitating my son’s journey; it is a very short period in what I hope to be a very long life for him, so yes, he most often decides when.

“That” Mom who always has stuff on her clothes

Yes, I am a mess everyday. I walk and bike where we need to go and am often sweaty. I always sit on the ground with my son and inevitably get grass, dirt, dew, you name it, on my clothes. My son is also a “nibbler”. He has food out all day long (and snacks when we are out and about) and alternates between playing and eating and checking in with me for a hug, kiss, pick up, nursing and whatever is on his hands always ends up on my shirt, pants, or in my hair. If it’s not that, it’s one of the above that is now a permanent stain. At a point in the future, parenting will be much more hands off, and maybe then I will manage to keep myself clean. I parallel it with the quote by Mary Randolph Carter that “A perfectly kept house is the sign of a misspent life”. My clothes are definitely representative of all the “living” we have done that day.

‘”That” Mom who treats her toddler “like a baby”

I wear my son in a front carry most places we go. I am almost always hugging him, cuddling him, kissing him, or just rubbing his back while he sits in my lap. He sleeps in our family bed for naps and nighttime. I nurse him whenever he wants and if he wants my attention or me close by, I give it to him. He amazes me almost daily with how much he knows, understands, comprehends, and observes for someone so young. He is definitely a little person of his own, and far from having the dependant nature of an infant that only knows being close to mama, breastfeeding, and touch, but he still enjoys those things, and in my opinion, at this point they are nothing but beneficial. He will grow up and be his own, independent being, but as of now he has only been on this earth for 17 months of what will hopefully be 100+ years. In the grand scheme of things, he is still a baby.

“That” Mom who is always talking about her child

Being a mama is my job right now, and I take it very seriously. So yes, I pretty much only talk about my work. And yes, I can tell you are not that interested but it’s my life and it is pretty all consuming for me. I also am just so obsessed with my son; he is the best.

“That” Mom who never tells her child no

I was explaining “gentle hands” to T after he was hitting me the other week and another parent I was talking with commented, “Gentle hands? Does that actually work? Doesn’t he know what ‘no’ means?”

I choose to always explain why or how we do things with T. Regardless of whether or not it is most effective immediately, I believe it is the right way to interact with him and will yield the most positive behavioral results in the long run.

It has been a crazy journey thus far, but as of now I have really embraced what kind of mama I am. I find myself being less and less self conscious about all of the things above as time passes too. Mostly, it has been a lesson for me in not judging, not labeling, and not isolating myself because some people choose to do things differently. No matter what kind of mom I am, I am trying my hardest everyday and that is all that matters. Funny looks, comments, and my own insecurities aside, I try to remind myself of that as often as I can.

There is also no greater feeling than being surrounding by other mamas who support, uplift, and laugh with you no matter *what* kind of mom you are that day. Finding our tribe in Arizona was invaluable to me that first year, we are still working on finding our perfect place here in California <3

Share your thoughts with us! How do you see yourself in your role as mom? How do other people see you? Has being a mom made you less prone to judging others?? I love hearing other mamas stories and perspectives!

Thoughtful Thursday: Accepting the Present

T & I attended our local La Leche League meeting last night and had a great time, as always. It left me with a lot of thoughts bouncing around in my head, which I thought I would share with you all for Thoughtful Thursday!

The topic was weaning + nutrition, which ironically enough was what I had a million questions about at last month’s meeting. One of the great leaders directed me to this wonderful book then, which I immediately checked out from their lending library and had the entire month to read, ponder, and realize what is right for our family.

One of the other mamas there was extremely frustrated with night nursing and her 15 month old, and was sharing how she was determined to night wean ASAP.  She was tired, needs to be up early for work often and just needed something to change big time. My heart went out to her, that is usually me, with my ongoing struggles of breastfeeding / being a mama in general.

I felt different this month though; lately I have been trying to accept the present for what it is, just the present. Not a product of what we have done in the past or a foreshadowing of what things will be like in the future, just what it is, today. When I start thinking that by nursing all day and all night and sharing a bed with T since birth it has made him a light/difficult sleeper, or that by nursing so frequently at 17 months I am hindering T’s socializing, or that if I am still nursing on demand now T may not wean until 4 or 5 years old, I can start to drive myself CRAZY.

Nursing is so controversial; there is so much information, so many opinions, and even more so when it comes to nursing + sleep or nursing + toddlers. Maybe that is why I am always struggling, always analyzing our breastfeeding relationship to try and change behaviors?

Breastfeeding is without a doubt a lifestyle choice; just like choosing to be a responsive or positive or empathetic or attachment parent. It takes work, dedication, sacrifice, and it will not always be easy. But it is a tool, a tool to provide nourishment and comfort. Sometimes T needs a hug in the middle of his play, sometimes he just wants to be picked up, sometimes he wants to read books, and sometimes he wants to nurse. I don’t question when he will stop “needing” hugs from me, and I am no longer questioning when he will stop needing to nurse. I do not always want to read “Oh The Thinks You Can Think” or “Put Me In The Zoo” or “If You Give A Moose A Muffin” 27 times in a row, but if I can, I do, and that is the same way I have been thinking about breastfeeding. If I can, I do.  If we need to make a change, we do, until we are in a better place. If we have a bad night, we stick close to home the next day and just take it easy, and try again the next night. If T needs to nurse 12 times throughout the night, he must be going through something. If he is nursing 12 times every night for quite awhile, then it must be something that nursing isn’t solving, so we will try some other things.

Everything changes so quickly with small children I have realized, and although this would have seemed crazy and overwhelming to me when I had an infant, up until even a few months ago, the present is all I ever needed to be concerned with. T will need things today that he may not have needed yesterday and may not need tomorrow. I am here to meet those needs as best I can, breastfeeding is just one of many tools I have to do so.

taking a break in the forest for some milk (:

taking a break in the forest for some milk (:

Focusing on the present day and the dynamics and workings of my & T’s relationship right now has made a world of difference in my outstanding questions, worries, and frustrations surrounding breastfeeding. It definitely lends itself well to other parenting challenges too and I hope to be able to keep these thoughts and “accepting the present” mantra handy for all kinds of situations.

Did anyone else struggle with breastfeeding “decisions”? When to wean, night wean, stop nursing on demand, etc? Do people ever tell you your son or daughter’s sleep/social/eating habits are because of breastfeeding or extended breastfeeding? We would love to hear your thoughts and stories!

 

A Day in the Life of… SAHM + 17 Month Old

A Day in the Life Of: SAHM & The 17 Month Old

Life has been a crazy roller coaster for our entire family since pretty much the week my son was born last March 2012, he arrived over three weeks later than we expected and we needed to be moved out of our apartment 8 days later. Since that move we have moved five (!!!!) more times but have currently been situated in our present (and hopefully permanent) town for a month now. In that month we have gotten down a pretty good routine, one that feels that it will stick around for a while, so I thought I would share what a typical day looks like for us.

8:00-9:00AM Wake Up!

T nurses throughout the entire night and is a very light sleeper. In the early morning hours he nurses the most but rolls around and keeps his eyes closed. He is not ready to start the day until 8 or 9, sometimes later. He will open his eyes and smile at me or stick out his tongue and laugh and our day has officially begun!

We get out of bed and head to the bathroom. T gets his pajama pants and crazy full nighttime diaper taken off and sits on his potty. I wash my face, brush my teeth, and get some light makeup on. Thresh sits on the counter & splashes his feet in the sink and plays with his toothbrush and makeup brushes I have set aside just for him. He helps brush my hair and sometimes throws a million Q-tips all over the bathroom floor.

a look of sheer joy for finding the roll of TP that is usually out of his reach, great for using the toilet and brushing my teeth!

a look of sheer joy for finding the roll of TP that is usually out of his reach, great for allowing me to use the toilet and brushing my teeth!

Next, we pick out his clothes for the day, put a fresh new diaper on, and then I dress him.

9:30AM Breakfast

T gets cut up fruit from the farmer’s market and then either some leftovers from the previous night’s dinner, scrambled egg, pancake, French toast, beans, bread with almond butter, or a homemade muffin of some sort. I like to give a lot of choices and switch things up but everything is very basic and whole food.

a sample of T's placemat: blueberries, strawberries, grapes, black beans & corn, chickpeas, tomatoes, & yellow carrots.

a sample of T’s plate: blueberries, strawberries, grapes, black beans & corn, chickpeas, tomatoes, & yellow carrots with a side of water 🙂 Green Sprouts Placemat

While he is busy eating I make my coffee and get dressed as fast as possible. I don’t know what it is about getting dressed but it is a sure fire way to make T hold on to my leg and scream or whine or just need something from me right then while I have no pants on or something equally as inconvenient.

There is usually a few books requested and read throughout the morning too, cannot forget the books. Just once is never ok; “more” is the most used sign in our house by far.

morning reads.

morning reads.

10:00AM Head Out

Each day’s morning activity is a little bit different but we are usually always out of the house around this time.

Monday: Rotates

Tuesday: Age Related Class at Parent’s Place

Wednesday: Tots in Motion

Thursday: Story time at our local library

Friday: Art & Food Class

Mondays (& sometimes Wednesdays) we rotate with different things around town. Sometimes we will bike to the mall if I need to pick something, it is outdoors and T loves running around and playing by the fountain and doing the stairs. We also walk or bike to various beaches and playgrounds.

our bike riding set up - walking is easier but our bike allows us to cover more distance! (this was just a test ride, I always wear a helmet & do not bike in dresses typically haha)

our bike riding set up – walking is easier but our bike allows us to cover more distance! (this was just a test ride, I always wear a helmet & do not bike in dresses typically haha)

exploring at the beach this day.

exploring at the beach this day.

12:00PM Errands

Since we are out and about I will make a quick stop anywhere I might need like the post office or market, return library books, pop into the children’s consignment store to see if they have any “new” goods, etc. T usually wants to walk some of the way home and we stop to enjoy many plants and dogs and birds a long the way.

stopping at the park on the way home & taking some selfless :)

stopping at the park on the way home & taking some selfies (:

1:00PM Lunch & Play

We are home and I assemble T some more food, he has had some sort of snack while we were out and about but now hopefully he will eat some more and fill himself up a bit before nap time. Dinner leftovers, bean salad, roasted veggies, quinoa, lentils, more fruit, olives, cheese, and hummus make appearances often.

lunch today: blueberries, leftover chicken quinoa, and more black beans & corn

lunch today: blueberries, leftover chicken quinoa, and more black beans & corn

We read more books and sometimes play outside and if T is particularly engaged in his toys/play room I try to prep anything I can for dinner that night.

some lunch time play

some lunch time play

2:00 PM Naptime

There is usually a semi meltdown or at least some clingy-ness and/or whining around this time so we head to the bedroom for a new diaper, close the blinds, put on the white noise and lay down together to nurse to sleep.

Once T is sleeping I sneak out and do a quick clean up of the place, throw in some laundry or finish what dinner prep I was doing earlier, make a snack for myself, and work on the computer.

T usually wakes around 3PM and if I catch him quickly enough can nurse him back down for another half hour or hour. Sometimes I lay with him and read or work on my phone.

4:00PM Afternoon Adventures

T is awake and ready to party! I offer him more food when he wakes up and he will usually eat quite a bit. Then we read lots of books, play in his teepee and playroom and pretty quickly it is time to head outside.

awake & enjoying his playroom, searching for the perfect read

awake & enjoying his playroom, searching for the perfect read

On Mondays we walk down to the farmer’s market and finish our shopping for the week and Tuesdays we walk to pick up our CSA seafood delivery. We play with the neighbor’s dog; play with balls in the street, go on wagon rides, walk through the forest near our house, dig in the dirt in the backyard, and find other things to explore in our neighborhood.

off to pick up our CSA Fish share on a Tuesday afternoon

off to pick up our CSA Fish share on a Tuesday afternoon

6:00PM Dinner Prep

It is hard getting T back inside but usually I manage somehow and enlist his help in starting dinner. He hangs out in his learning tower throwing anything and everything onto the ground, plays in the sink, bangs together some dishes, samples whatever I am putting together, and the like. Sometimes he takes all of the garbage bags out from under the sink, all of the mason jar lids out of the drawer, bangs measuring cups together, empties the pantry, stacks muffin liners, and other various kitchen shenanigans. He gets frustrated easily during this time and wants my full attention and I usually don’t get very far into my cooking.

using the learning tower to help wash some dishes

using the learning tower to help wash some dishes

6:30PM Daddy is home!

My husband is usually home by 6:30 and is greeted by a squealing T who immediately runs outside to greet him and to partake in one of his favorite activities, playing in the car (we only have the one car my husband takes to work every day). He climbs in and pushes a million buttons, plays music, etc. etc. etc. while I finish up dinner, yes!

dinner prep: note all the different bowls, etc. I do a little bit at a time throughout the day, this was right before it was going into the pan. Pictured is the chicken fried quinoa from a couple of nights ago.

dinner prep: note all the different bowls, etc. I do a little bit at a time throughout the day, this was right before it was going into the pan. Pictured is the chicken fried quinoa from a couple of nights ago.

7:00PM Eat, Clean, Play

We eat together while T tries to convince us to read books or take him outside and we try to coerce him into having a couple more bites. I clean the kitchen and my husband takes over playtime. They wrestle, read books, and play outside. I am exhausted at this point; there is almost always wine with my kitchen cleaning.

8:30PM Wind Down

There is usually some eye rubbing or yawning, but T fights his sleepy urges to the death. We take the opportunity to put on a nighttime diaper, pajamas, and turn all of the lights down low. T is not loving baths these days so we have been skipping them and every so often do a quick sink bath, he goes back and forth between bath loving and bath hating. I need to get some new bath toys, bath books, and glow sticks – I have heard glow sticks will turn the most avid toddler bath haters around! We all stay in our bedroom and read books, play around in bed, snuggle, laugh, and just marvel at how much personality this small human that is part of our family has.

9:00/9:30PM Lights Out

T usually isn’t ready to call it a night until about 9:00 or 9:30. We turn off the final light and lay down to nurse to sleep. Sometimes it’s easy, and sometimes he gets up at least 43 more times before he finally drifts off. I have thrown all expectations out the window and never “plan” anything for after bedtime. T is so unpredictable and half the time I fall asleep before or when he does. If I do happen to stay awake, I sneak off and eat some cookies or chocolate or drink more wine and work on the computer or read or fold laundry.

It is a simple life, but it is a great one.

What does your routine look like with your little one(s)? Do you find yourself taking it slower at different ages? I would love to hear what everyone does, we are always looking for new things to keep ourselves busy!

Child Spacing: Pregnancy #2 & Beyond

 

Before my son, T, was born I wanted four or five children. I loved pregnancy and couldn’t wait to experience it again and again. Giving birth was a little bit harder; post partum recovery was a doozy and taking care of a newborn, oh. my. goodness. I swore off having any more babies’ f o r e v e r.

About a year later, amidst tons of dirty diapers, still waking at all hours of the night, and breastfeeding on demand, I began to see sets of siblings running around.  Lo and behold, my empty uterus began to ache. I figured I was elbows deep in the full-time, always-on mom mode and I might as well have two babies! The first year is the hardest, it really does go by quick, having them close in age will be difficult but rewarding and let’s just doooo iiiitttt! 🙂 After stopping to think about it more though there really is a lot of additional things to consider. I figured I would share the different factors we looked at and what we found.

Fertility: During months 3, 4, and 5 post partum it seemed my cycle was trying to return, it never quite made it though and since then there have been no indications at all that my body is ovulating, I am now 16 months post partum, 26 months since my last menses! For some women fertility during breastfeeding is not an issue, but for many it is. I also don’t know how comfortable I am getting pregnant on the very first or even second or third cycles post baby – in my mind my body is still getting used to and figuring out my new hormone levels and for me personally I think I would like a few “trial” runs before the real deal, to me it seems that this would lead to more optimal conditions and a greater chance of a successful, healthy pregnancy. In order to “try” for another child I would have to take measures of increasing my fertility, either with herbs, acupuncture, yoga, meditation, etc. to guide my body to do something it isn’t entirely ready to do on it’s own. Often times the body needs help in certain areas of functionality and I am definitely ok with that, but not sure it is the right time to enlist this help just yet. Another way to help increase fertility would be to cut back on nursing, which leads right in to my next topic of consideration…

Breastfeeding/Weaning: Most of what I have read says fertility increases in women enough to stimulate ovulation when babies/children are no longer nursing at night and if not then, more than likely when nursing is down to 2-4 times a day or there is a four hour period between nursing sessions. My son nurses constantly, we night weaned for a bit but now are back to night nursing and mostly nursing on demand during the day as well. He uses nursing as a huge comfort tool and often just “checks in” with me for a few quick sucks and then is back doing whatever he was concentrating on previously. We had a brief encounter at 14 months with sudden weaning when I wished to stop nursing altogether, but now at 16 months I am hoping for child led or natural weaning. Which, let’s be real, probably won’t be until at least two and I would be willing to bet actually much longer. After talking with my husband, paying attention to T’s desires, habits, and needs, and self-reflecting we, personally, are not comfortable weaning our first baby in order to conceive a second baby.

With that being said though, I am really not keen on nursing through pregnancy or tandem nursing. Pregnancy took a lot from me, pregnancy #2 will be even more physically demanding due to caring for and chasing after a toddler. I know myself and do not want to start resenting my nursing toddler while I am tired, hormonal, and not in my usual state of mind. I also know that those first weeks and months of caring for a newborn are extremely hard for me physically and emotionally and I believe we will all have the best shot at surviving as harmoniously as possible if only the new baby is nursing. So do we allow T to entirely self wean and then start ‘trying’ for a sibling? They could be 4, 5, 6 years apart on that path. At this point I feel like I am definitely over thinking things, so what do the facts say? What actually happens in the most natural of settings? For this I look to research of primal/rural cultures…

Natural Child Spacing & Rural Populations: Most rural populations practice ecological breastfeeding, very similar to what my son & I do. This practice is said to delay the return of menses until 14.6 months on average, with most women conceiving again between 18 & 30 months post partum.When studying rural women in Rwanda who do not use contraception it was found that 75% of mothers conceived between 24 & 29 months post partum. Studies conducted among Kung¡ women show they naturally conceive again around 35 months post partum. There is also evidence that waiting to conceive until at least 18 to 23 months from your last pregnancy produces better outcomes for baby. There are also various studies that show that as the time between pregnancies goes down, the risk for Autism in subsequent babies goes up.

The Powers of Nature: After reviewing the facts and pondering the many unanswered questions I still had regarding what we should actually do, it was my husband that brought me back down to earth, as he so often does in these types of situations. He explained that we try our hardest to align our lives with how humans once lived. We try to connect with our inner “natural” needs, desires, and treat our bodies as close as we can to the ways in which they thrived for tens of thousands of years prior to more ‘civilized’ conditions. If we trust in our bodies abilities to heal, grow, change, and adapt on it’s own we can trust that they will create children as close or as far apart as is best for all of us. If T is still nursing enough that my body is unable to conceive than neither T nor myself are ready for another baby. When he is nursing an amount small enough for fertility to return than his need is decreasing and he is closer to weaning and closer to being ready for a sibling. Although there can still be many outstanding questions (some I have thrown out above) we believe in the power of nature to guide us through life, birth, death, and conception, family planning, child spacing is no different.

I know that, “letting whatever happens happen” is not a profound conclusion or advice, but I think if there is anything that becoming a parent has taught me it is that there is a large element of control that you have no choice but to give up. For us, it makes sense that this also applies to baby #2. I know not everyone is in the same situation or even has the same factors as us to consider but as of now we are just happy to enjoy our son and meet his needs as best as we can. As day-to-day life changes, we will reflect and readjust accordingly.

What about you, are you thinking about baby number 2 or 3 or more? Did you plan or influence your child spacing? How? I would love to hear your stories and/or input!

Elimination Communication (EC): Tales of a Diaper Free Baby

Posted by Cassandra Okamoto

I first came across Elimination Communication way before I was even pregnant. I read all about it here, here, and here, and after devouring up all of the information, testimonials, FAQ’s and concerns it just made so much sense to me and sounded completely “do-able” whenever we decided to have a child. My husband was definitely not convinced. He was used to me coming to him with “extreme” ideas: Let’s eat vegan! Let’s have a completely vegan life! Let’s eat all raw! Do NOT get the dog his shots! Throw away all of the cleaning products, now! Don’t flush the toilet if it’s just pee! Pee while you shower!

But no diapers on a baby? Potty training an infant? He was definitely skeptical.

Whenever EC comes up in conversation most people do refer to it as “infant potty training” but that really was never what it was about to me, or even it’s appeal. I loved the idea of giving baby an opportunity and space to relieve him/herself and not forcing him/her to sit in wet or soiled diapers unnecessarily, which could be in conflict with his or her natural, instinctual desire. Below is our journey practicing EC with our now 15 month old.

When my son, T, was first born we started cloth diapers pretty soon after and although EC was still on my mind, we were in strict survival mode – washing diapers was all I could manage. Around 14 weeks post partum we were getting in a little better hang of things and I ordered Diaper Free Baby off of Amazon to read up on the specifics of how to implement with my now almost 4 month old.

We started by just letting him be naked on some towels and whenever he would pee or poo I would make the pppppsssssssss sound for him to try & start associating that sound with the sensation of going. Next I would hold him in the squat position over the toilet… he did NOT like this. A lot of the other moms we spent time with regularly that had babies only a couple weeks or months older than my babe were having tons of success with EC in practice and I was determined to keep trying… so the next thing I did was buy the BABYBJORN potty chair.

My son was actually not into this potty either, he wasn’t really able to sit by himself and although we could hold him on it for a few seconds before he started fussing it was never long enough for him to relax enough to go to the bathroom. We “caught” a few pees but that was it…

Baby-led potty-training w/ 16-week old

Baby-led potty-training w/ 16-week old

So after this (when T was 15/16 weeks old) I gave up on EC for a while. I got super sick right after that and my husband and mom were on baby duty for a couple of days and it all kind of went out the window.

But, around the time T was about to turn six months old, I got the itch to start up EC again and it was a whole different experience!

As soon as he would wake up in the morning the first thing we would do is take him to the regular potty, hold him over in the squat position and wait until he peed. He was totally comfortable in that position now & would never fuss!! He would always pee in the morning and then we would do the same after every nap. He almost always went, and we even caught a few poos this way too! I journaled about an after nap EC experience we had during this time that said “you woke up from a long nap kind of fussy (which is rare, you are usually only fussy when you wake up prematurely) so I took your pants & diaper off and went straight to the bathroom and almost immediately you pooed a TON & then peed, wooo hoooo!”

We would still make the ‘pppppppsssssssss’ sound when he was going in hopes that he would start associating that & the squat position with eliminating. I still had not noticed any cues from him: certain faces, grunting, etc. that indicated to me that he had to go but we kept doing the ASL potty sign too, and stayed hopeful that sometime soon he would catch on to that or we would start to notice some sort of other pattern or something. It really excited me! Diapers are really NOT exciting at all, but this was. It was so nice to not have to wash as many diapers, ESPECIALLY poo ones now that he was eating solids, and it felt like we are just making huge strides in our communication with each other, I loved it. My husband would take him to the potty too, which was awesome!

After he was sitting up really well unassisted, around 7 months, we started setting him on the small potty chair again. He was much more comfortable at this age and would sit for a while, playing with toys or just hanging out with us. He would poo & pee, too! We started taking him not just after naps but at all different transitions, when he would wake up, when we got out of the car seat, when we got out of the carrier, before we left the house and sometimes a few minutes after nursing. When we would arrive somewhere I would take him and hold him over the toilet in a public restroom, or often times just outside of the car in the parking lot! We were getting in a really good groove and it didn’t really take much extra effort at all, just undoing & redoing diapers but it wasn’t that big of a deal.

We also bought a few more little potty chairs from IKEA to have around the house so we weren’t always running to the bathroom. Having them scattered about was really convenient for us and I loved that T was comfortable and happy sitting on them.

Baby-led potty-training in progress

Baby-led potty-training in progress

Baby-led potty-training at playtime

Baby-led potty-training at playtime

This went on for a couple of months and then T started crawling, yay! Not so great for the potty though. Now he was able to climb off of the little potty whenever we would set him on it, he was MUCH harder to manage during diaper changes as he just wanted to roll over and go, go, go, and it was much more difficult to watch for any “signs” that he needed to go to the bathroom when he was off exploring.

Potty chairs are fun to play with though!

Potty chairs are fun to play with though!

This was a big time of transition for us, T loved being mobile, his mood was dramatically different, and it was the beginning of a lot more bodily independence between him and I. I was ok letting EC take a back burner for a while. He was learning and exploring and discovering at such a fast rate and we as parents were now deep in the “how to” of balancing freedom and safety and boundaries and awareness with a mobile child.

We changed houses a lot during the next months, stayed with different family members, moved states, but we always managed to spend time outside and I almost always gave T some diaper free time each day.

Around 12 months I noticed that he seemed to have more awareness of when he had to/was about to go to the bathroom. He would be naked outside and he would always look down before he peed, when he had to poo he would usually stand up and hold onto something, still and quiet for a bit, then go. This was huge to me! I felt like if he was aware of what was about to happen it would only be a matter of time before he would be able to communicate it to me or take himself to the potty to go.

He is now 15 months old and that is pretty much where we are. In the morning when he wakes up we go to the potty and he almost always goes pee, same when he wakes up from his nap in the afternoon.  He spends a lot of time during the day diaper free and almost always looks down before he pees, sometimes I am fast enough to put him on the potty other times I wait until he is done and then put him on the potty anyways and explain to him that the potty is the best place to go. I can usually tell when he is about to poo and if we are able to get his diaper off and get to the potty in time we do. I honestly don’t see us being diaper free outside of the house for a long while, it isn’t something I am pushing for and I am all about making things as easy and convenient as possible when it comes to being out and about with a toddler. I believe as he can start communicating more he will tell me when he is ready! I know he is only 15 months which is still very young when it comes to “potty training” but at this point it is not a stressful thing for us and I hope it continues that way over the course of the next year.

Letting child follow his body's cues

Letting child follow his body’s cues

Our EC story is a very part time one, but I am grateful to have come across the knowledge early and give T the opportunity to get comfortable on the potty and relieving himself outside of a diaper from a young age.

What are your experiences with EC? Have you heard of it, tried it? At what ages? We would love to hear your story!