Tag Archives: living

The Short Story

I married an entrepreneur. I knew this going into our marriage. He happened to be in an upcycle when we met – his business was growing, he was moving and shaking, the business grew – it was sold – money was abundant.

There came a period of introspection. Learning. Trying something different. It was good – but it didn’t feed his soul. Sprinkled in there were little comments that we were living outside of our means. It didn’t click until I saw that his stress levels were going up the longer he financed our lifestyle.

A little sub-text in the story was the unbelievable election cycle in 2016. I had this nagging feeling we had to cut everything loose just in case we wanted to be free to go anywhere in the world. I knew it would be hard to walk away from our comfortable home if we had a mortgage on it.

Then one night,  I told him the craziest thing I never imagined saying: Let’s sell it all. Let’s get rid of all the burden so you can create again.

Even though it killed me to say it, and it took me a long time to get there, I said it. I meant it…I know that the creative spirit is bound by temporal things, and I couldn’t stand to see my husband unhappy.  I couldn’t imagine how to invest in a start-up while having to contend with all our bills. We sold our vacation home in the Rim Country, we sold our beautiful home in the metro area, we cut back on all the extras that were a luxury. Thankfully, we were still able to provide all the extra-curricular activities for our beloved Sweet Pea Kids.

As the Master Planner would have it, there was a job offer for a start-up in Boston that came along around that time – selling everything made sense. Then that offer didn’t come through as we had hoped, however we were still in a place of having the flexibility to do whatever we wanted to do for our family. There was serious talk about moving overseas after the election results. I was tying up loose ends, continuing the purge process, and researching different places we might want to travel with the children.

Then a new door opened.

“Whatever” came along about a month after my husband walked away from the Boston opportunity.  After he did a few months of business consulting, we are “all in”. There have been months of travel to a different city. Single-mom status during the week. Quick hellos between the crazy weekend schedule we keep. Slowly finding ways for him to be home more and travel less as the company moves it’s home-base to Phoenix.

We have also learned to appreciate abundance in all things – our good health, our loving family, making joyful memories, the time when all six of us enjoy a meal at the dining room table without having to be anywhere else.

And we are happy. We listened to the still, small voice that was telling us to let go and trust God with all our heart, all our soul, all our mind.  I am glad we listened. I can’t wait to see where we go next.

Here are some quotes that remind us why we embrace the entrepreneur lifestyle. And to borrow a line from baseball, “Don’t get too high, don’t get too low”.

Image credit ~
Penny Chenery Quote: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/514325219922902808/
Secretariat Image: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/343681015286631944/

Monday Musings: Living

If you have been following along the blog for a while, you know that 2016 was a huge year of shift for us.  We sold our two homes – both of which we loved – in preparation for a possible move across the country.  We also lost many family and friends as they moved on to the next journey after life.

Just when we thought we were through the woods of all this shift, another beloved mother in our circle passed away suddenly in December. I am still not clear if it was a stroke event or a heart attack – what ever it was, it was enough to invite her to move on – and she did, leaving behind a husband and four children.

I am devastated for her child that is Night Owl’s age – she was the surprise baby after their three older children had basically made them empty-nesters.  And also for her three older children that will now go through all their adult “firsts” without their mother, to say nothing of her husband who is now going to have to find his new normal as well. It is so much to process…and yet I realize that they are not alone and someone, somewhere, is holding vigil tonight for a beloved soul that will pass along before all the goodbye’s have been said.

This woman’s passing hit especially close to home since she was the same age as my beloved husband. I came home from her services and told Daddy Bruss that the first order of business in 2017 is for him to have a complete physical and catch up on any tests that he hasn’t had in a while and/or yet that are suggested for people his age.  I also realized that it’s time for me to admit that I am practically in my mid-40’s  and it’s time for me to take me own advice.

Her passing also made me recommit to my intention to Live Life Today.  There are things that are important and things that really don’t matter.  It has made me really motivated to get rid of the junk and clutter that we accumulate because There Is No Time To Waste on Small Stuff.

My new intention for our homeschool day is to only do “things” until noon, and then have lunch and go out and have experiences with our children.  I don’t know if we are going to finish our curriculum as I had planned before I had these revelations, quite frankly I don’t think I care anymore.  As long as the Sweet Peas do math, read, write, make music and dance every day I think we are going to meet the rest of any requirements on field trips.

I watched THIS TED Talk tonight and it is right on point to where I am in my life. Thankfully my revelations arrived through the course of reflection over all the grief we experienced as a family last year, and not a highly stressful experience like this speaker lived through.

Since deciding that my ultimate goal is being the best parent I am capable of being, I have not felt a huge struggle with the yelling.  I close my eyes, I take deep breaths, I remember Lisa Reinhardt’s voice guiding us “to be” at the pace of melting chocolate, and I count until I can open my eyes and answer calmly.

Quite frankly, if I die tomorrow, I have a very clear picture of what I want my children to remember, and it’s not Crazy Mama.  We all sent her on a long vacation.  I hope that the intention to be Peaceful Mama is strong enough this time to leave her there a good, long time.

Peaceful Mama has huge hopes and dreams. I want them to remember a mother who showed up for them.  I want them to remember that my deepest desire is for them is to find their passion in life and pursue it.  I want them to remember that my love for them was deeper than the oceans and I hope they will use it to soar higher than the stars, because I believe in their greatness and ability to do anything with their talents that they set their mind to achieving.  I want them to remember that I am one of their biggest fans and that they are very, very loved.

I want them to know that their father and I conceived them in love, brought them into the world in love, and that they are loved in such a way that nothing can separate them from us.  We will always strive do whatever is in our power to help them learn, grow, explore and invite them to take risks so that they can learn who they are meant to be and what their God-given gift is to use for the benefit of others.  I want them to remember that we made choices in our personal life to facilitate the pursuit of our dreams, and that creativity and helping others is an honorable pursuit.

If the way I live my life in whatever time I have left conveys this to them, then my work on this earth is complete. It’s so easy to take time for granted and put things off because There Are Things To Do.  The bottom line is that there will always be Things To Do.  The time to be in relationship is limited.

I don’t know how much time I have left, so I am doing a lot more snuggling and saying more I love you’s than I used to.  I continue to remind myself of their love languages so that they receive the love in actions as well as in words.  Much of my desire to speak more and do more as it relates to my passion for birth and breastfeeding and the childbearing year has taken a back seat to my desire to be someone they remember fondly and with love.

So now I am signing off to have a late night snuggle with none other than Night Owl.  Good night.  Wishing you all a day full of love <3